Friday, May 06, 2005

THE BEST FIGHT I EVER WITNESSED

I've been checking out IMAO's Carnival of Comedy. I found something that reminded me of an incident from my early teaching days.

Jimbo Over at Military Matters posts about the best brawl he ever witnessed.

Well, not being in the military, ever, (although I am the proud mom of several sailors and soldiers), my experience of free-for-alls is somewhat limited, at least since I stopped bartending.

But, you know, I have seen a really great fight. It happened like this:

I was sub teaching in an urban district I won't mention, and covering a magnet high school's biology class. It was just before the bell rang, when I was trying to herd sophomores (worse than herding cats, I swear) into their corrals seats. All of a sudden, the door slammed open, and a truly irate girl came in and proceeded to dress down another girl for man-poaching. Her language was so colorful and her ire so spectacular, that I did nothing but stand there with my mouth open, as did the entire class.

She finally ran down after about a couple of minutes, and swung around to leave. She hadn't taken two steps, when the unfazed recipient of her anger said, "But he prefers ME."

Well, that set off another tirade, even longer and more venom-filled. She finally ran out of spew, and turned to leave again.

This time she nearly made it to the door, when she heard, "He likes me better."

She leapt over 2 lab tables, and the hair extensions were flying. Fortunately, chivalry was in evidence, as several sweet boys put their bodies on the line to move them apart, and one went for the security staff.

Me?

I was laughing too hard to be of any assistance at all.

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